Situationships

GRIPE OF THE DAY

On today’s issue, we’d be tackling:

• The messy grey area that is “situationships”

• How it happens and how people find themselves in one

• Signs you’re in a situationship

• How to get out of one

Let’s begin!!!

THE BREAKDOWN

Situationships…

In Google Speak, it is a romantic and often sexual relationship between two people—usually consenting adults—that lacks clear boundaries, commitment, or definition. It's often characterized by ambiguity, uncertainty, and a lack of formal commitment or labels, such as boyfriend/girlfriend or exclusive partners.

But here’s how I like to define situationships. It’s a relationship between two people that don’t know what the fuck they’re doing or what they want out of their relationship that always ends in tears.

From my definition, you can already deduce that I dislike it because it’s messy and leaves people in murky waters.

Usually, people involved in situationships may enjoy spending time together, being intimate, and engaging in activities typical of a romantic relationship. But they do not define their relationship or commit to each other for reasons best known to them.

So how does a situationship happen in the first place?

I blame the current modern dating landscape.

Let me explain

Commitment is as elusive in the current dating landscape as a unicorn with a GPS tracker. People swipe left, swipe right, and before they know it, they're knee-deep in a sea of options, each one more compelling than the last. It's like being a kid in a candy store, except the candy keeps changing flavours, and none come with a label.

Plus, nowadays, the dating scene is riddled with a lot of judgement and the weird need to appear excellently perfect with no flaws whatsoever. This has made 99.99% of people in the dating scene terrified of the rejection that may or may not occur when they are vulnerable with how they feel. So, instead of laying all their cards on the table, they tiptoe around the elephant in the room, pretending that "hanging out" is just as good as "going steady."

Last but not least, there’s a lot of FOMO in the current dating scene A.K.A fear of missing out. People are so busy swiping, liking, and DMing that they forget to stop and ask themselves what they want. So they end up settling for half-baked connections with no form of intimacy.

For people currently reading this and are not sure if they are currently in a situationship, here are the tell-tale signs to look out for;

• No form of commitment

• There’s going to be a lot of “mixed signals”

• Little to no intimacy outside physical A.K.A. sexual intercourse.

• Inconsistent communication

• Undefined relationship status

If you are currently in a situationship and want to get the fuck out…here’s what I recommend you did

COMMUNITY UPDATES

The slots for my weekly coaching sessions are now open. Choose success in your love life here

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YOUR PLAYBOOK

Step 1: Define Your Boundaries
The first thing to do is lay down some ground rules. Ask yourself what you want from the relationship. Be honest with yourself about your needs, wants and desires. Once you've got a clear picture of your needs, wants and desires, create boundaries that help you enforce them.

Step 2: Have the “What are we” Talk
What are we? The one question players globally dread.
Rip off the Band-Aid and get real with your situationship partner. Schedule a time to chat (preferably in person or via video call) and lay your cards on the table. Be honest, but also be compassionate. Express your feelings and concerns, and listen to theirs as well. This conversation will be uncomfortable but remember: clarity and your peace of mind are worth more than the temporary discomfort caused by the conversation.

Step 3: Set Clear Expectations
Now that you've had “the talk”, it's time to set your boundaries. What are you both comfortable with? Are you exclusive, or is it okay to see other people? Are you okay with the casual nature of your relationship, or are you looking for something more serious? Be clear and upfront about your expectations, and don't be afraid to revisit the conversation as your feelings evolve.

Step 4: Take Care of Yourself
While navigating the murky waters of your situationship, don't forget to prioritize self-care. Take time to check in with yourself regularly and assess how you're feeling. Are you happy, fulfilled, and emotionally supported? If not, it might be time to reevaluate your situation and make some changes.

Final Step: Know When to Walk Away
Sometimes, some things just aren't meant to be. You cannot force anyone to love you the way you want. That is not also selfish on your part but detrimental to your self-esteem, self-image and self-worth.
If you want a romantic relationship that is exclusive, defined and serious but your potential romantic partner doesn’t then the best thing to do is walk away. Yes, it will hurt. Yes, you will feel bad temporarily. But in the long run, you’d be glad you did. You deserve happiness, clarity, and a relationship that fulfils your needs. Don't settle for anything less.

COMMUNITY PERKS

As a valued community member, I can assist you in effortlessly attracting your ideal romantic partner and nurturing a satisfying relationship through my simple 3-step method and services;

1. Through the Love Navigator program. It is a tailored coaching program to help you confidently navigate the dating scene. This program will teach you the art of vetting potential romantic partners and mastering the skills to become irresistible to your ideal match. You can express your interest in embarking on this transformative journey here.

2. Through this FREE email newsletter, my YouTube channel, and various social media platforms I have an account with, I consistently share the unspoken rules, principles and secrets that guide healthy romantic relationships.
   P.S. Follow @chikeoranye on X, Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, LinkedIn Threads and Bluesky to stay connected.

3. Through my digital product offerings. They are the tools you need to conquer any obstacle that may arise to threaten your relationship's harmony. You can also opt-in for personalized one-off coaching sessions with me to tackle your romantic relationship challenges and get your personalised roadmap for relationship success.

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